Stealth, It’s Not Just For Wealth Anymore

Stealth Wealth

For many of us, it feels downright uncomfortable to show our wealth to the general public.  Yes, we certainly aren’t shy when blogging, but outside fo the digital world, we generally keep our status to ourselves.

This serves a number of purposes.

• Frugality: As well documented in The Millionaire Next Door, we didn’t attain financial independence by being showy.
• Anonymity: People look at you differently when they know you have a million dollars in the bank.  While it might not be conscious, it can affect your relationships.  I’m pretty convinced that my well documented stealth wealth fail cost me a few medical directorships.
• Self Image: there is a certain joy about picturing ourselves as Clark Kent or Bruce Wayne.  While our friends and neighbors may see us as mild-mannered (ie puny and helpless), only we know that underneath those jeans and t-shirt is a rocking set of blue and red tights.

This principle, this stealth superpower, helps define ourselves as individuals within the financial independence community.

But the funny thing about stealth, it’s not just for wealth anymore.

Stealth Health(care)

I have a silly fantasy that I retell my wife from time to time (Get your mind out of the gutter!).  We go together to a party, and are surrounded by people who don’t know us well.  As we chat amiably, eventually the conversation turns to what we do for a living.

I’m a lawyer and work downtown, he’s an accountant at a big ten firm, she does HR for an academic institution.

And then eyes turn to me expectantly,

Oh me, I stock shelves at Trader Joe’s.

Gasp!  I hate to discuss my profession.  I avoid it at every turn.

Stealth Poverty

Have you ever met someone who was too quick to tell you about their wealth?  What did you find when you dug deeper?  Despite all their fancy cars and model homes, they are likely poor.  Leveraged to the eyeballs,  their braggadocio is usually an attempt to compensate for not only a lack of confidence, but also funds.

I find the same with medicine.  The depraved soul who throws around his status as a physician while making reservations at a restaurant, or requires to be called Doctor before her last name, has a staggering deficit of self-worth.  While it’s fun to use your profession in your blog’s title,  it gets tiresome when you have to keep reminding people at every turn in the non-digital domain.

And then there is the problem of how people perceive you.  I can’t tell you how many times I was having a perfectly wonderful conversation that died the minute my fellow companion found out that I was a physician.  A certain guardedness takes over that clouds normal human communication.  People make assumptions about you based on your profession.  Sometimes I find it refreshing to hide behind the cloak of a bland moniker.

What do I do for a living?  I’m a blogger!

D’oh!  That might get you a little extra attention also.

Stealth______?

Are there other things you keep from the public because it’s just easier?

Exercise?  Diet?

Do we have any stealth marathoners out there?  How about stealth vegans?

What perfectly normal thing do you try not to share with new acquaintances?